Sarcoma radiotherapy finished
Monitor every three months. Fingers crossed that’s the last we’ll see of it. Due to still-missing vena cava I’m still wildly out of breath every time I do something like run for a train, which I did just now, 30 metres plus 30 stairs, and thought I might pass out before I recovered. Took fully 10 minutes to get my breath back.
Prostate radiotherapy about to start
24 sessions, every weekday til end of August. About 45 mins to an hour each; they are longer than last lot, as bladder has to be at a known fullness before they can zap me.
Meanwhile thanks to testosterone-vanquishing wonder-drug Zoladex my levels of said manliness-hormone have dropped to almost zero (that being the ultimate aim according to prostate radiotherapy consultant) and my male sexual characteristics are tending to shrink (prostate, testicles, yeah I’m enjoying that one, luckily not penis although it’s a bit hard (!) to tell as an erection right now is just a dim and distant memory, and pretty much the use to which one is normally put, too. And loss of some of my more gorilla-like hairs.
Almost hourly hot flushes keep reminding me what it’s like to be menopausal, my hormones are all over the shop, and I’m crying at the stupidest things. Actually, everything.
After the radiotherapy finishes I shall almost immediately be subject to the joys of a “brachytherapy boost”, which is essentially Novichok up the arse to scare off the cancer.
Ok it’s actually iridium they put up there, and via my perineum, hurrah. I will be admitted and prepped, then in the morning they will insert several flexible tubes into my prostate, guided by MRI scanner, while I am deeply unconscious (I fucking hope). Then they catheterise me, and wake me up. With a bunch of tubes sticking out of a hole between my arsehole and ballsack. Sounds like fun, right? Don’t worry, I’ll share some selfies.
Then my team of highly-paid consultants will attach the tubes to a Machine That Goes Ping, and basically go and have a cup of coffee while said machine pushes tiny pieces of highly radioactive iridium 192 isotope a precise depth into each of the tubes for a precisely controlled duration. 20 minutes later the coffee is drunk and the machine finished, whereupon they yank out the tubes and catheter and crack open the Prosecco.
I get to recover til lunchtime ish next day and can drive myself home. Possibly sitting on a pile cushion.
That little procedure is apparently the equivalent of 4 more weeks of radiotherapy so, unpleasant as it sounds, it’s better than the alternative.
The worst side-effect is apparently a constant desire to pee, which will be unrelieved by peeing. For about THREE WEEKS for fuck’s sake. So in the words of one or other consultant, “don’t make any plans for September”.
(with micro-surgery re-attached ligament) is healing nicely. Disappointed to note that titanium insert doesn’t trigger airport security.
healing less well but in the words of numerous maxillofacial and orthodontic consultants, there is “fuck-all” they can do about it so I have to grin and bear it. It’s getting better but still “snaps” a lot which causes clicks audible to bystanders as well as searing pain to me.
are all doing well thank you except for Jasmine whom I’ve not seen since I got back to the flat on Tuesday evening. She will probably turn up. Gizmo is turning into a very loving boy, he is lately being way more affectionate than he has been over the last 9 months since I took him on. All others much the same.
Oh yes. ADHD.
I started a six week group therapy thing but three unrelated crises arose in weeks 3, 4 and 5, so I threw in the towel. More useful are the drugs, which help me focus.
The more I learn about ADHD the more it explains so many things. Very glad I got the diagnosis.
And Life in General
is good. I’m getting happier. Changes are afoot, of a few varieties including the moving-house variety, possibly as early as end of September, and I’m really, really looking forward to moving. With zero irony. Seriously, I can’t wait to leave New Malden, and my heart is already in my next location.
Thanks, as ever, for reading.